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The most famous proponent was William Coley, the so-called “Father of Immunotherapy,” at what would eventually become Memorial Sloan Kettering.

He “was convinced that having a severe infection could cause cancer to regress.” So, with “a great deal of courage,” he started injecting cancer patients.

What we want to know is if they actually live longer.

The only English-language, randomized, double-blind, placebo-controlled trial of breast cancer patients and beta-glucans was more of a wound-healing study, where they found that the women taking beta-glucans healed so much faster after surgery that the tubes could be removed from their chests and armpits—in some cases, days earlier.

But, that’s because the placebo cream worked so well, too.

“Both groups showed a…significant reduction.” They speculated that “[s]ince each patient…acted as their own control,” putting the beta-glucan cream on one arm, and the placebo cream on the other, that the application of beta-glucans on one arm may have been absorbed into the system, and helped on the other arm, given that systematic effects have been noted following topical administration.For example, if you take freshly excised tumors of breast cancer patients, and let loose natural killer cells upon them, they can kill off a small percentage of the tumor cells.But, first prime them with some yeast beta-glucans, and they become five times more effective at killing cancer cells. When twenty-three women with metastatic breast cancer were given just a 16 of a teaspoon of nutritional yeast worth of beta-glucans, they experienced a 50% increase in the number of monocyte white blood cells in their bloodstream (which are part of our natural defenses), as well as a significant increase in their activation. The clinical significance of this finding is unclear.In Japan, there have been more than 20 randomized, controlled trials on the use of beta-glucans as an adjunct cancer treatment, which evidently show an enhancement of chemo or radiation therapy, resulting in “a positive effect on the survival and quality of life…” For example, there was evidently a study on taking a yeast beta-glucan supplement to help “cancer relapse after surgery.There were no relapses in the treated group compared to [about one in five] in the control group.” Even more intriguing, yeast beta-glucans for cancer patients—end-stage cancer, since only about one in 20 patients made it three months.Well, that’s the theory behind therapeutic cancer vaccines—one of which has been in practice for decades: squirting a weakened bovine tuberculosis bacteria into the bladders of patients with bladder cancer, to make the immune system attack; boosting long-term survival up to 36%.Okay, but is there something we can eat that can boost immune function?The problem, of course, is that causing infections is quite dangerous, and “two of his patients died.” However, their tumors did shrink!If only there was a way we could boost the immune system without killing people.So this an alternate versions of the events of that episode. “Sure, just let me…” Mabel turned her head only to find, Dipper was missing. “Excuse me a moment.” She ran off, looking for her stupid brother. I need you to befriend this cute boy and tell him how adorable I am..” When she saw Dipper, he was peeling the wall paper. She noticed that her shoes where back on and her clothes felt weird. We can’t let anyone know, they’ll think we’re crazy. Everything up to this episode is pretty much the same as in canon. “Mabel, I think I found something.” Later “Hey Grunkle Stan, what room is this? Maybe Soo’s would believe us, but let’s just keep this between us until I can get a better grasp on what’s going on.” Mabel watched as her brother ran off in her body, well his body now.

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