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From our Austin edition, here’s a primer on why hating the Aggies is totally justified, and fun.If you decide to fall in love with this team instead of hating them, you’ll just end up hating them even more. Alternative Health shops for orgone energy products for geopathic stress, colloidal silver, food grade hydrogen peroxide, horoscopes and directories of Dating and other alternative information sites.With boots, Daisy Dukes, and a cowboy hat to match, they’ll have you falling in love with Texas style in no time.People in BCS grew up chowing down on that famous Texas barbecue you’ve heard so much about.These days, the sabers are welded to their scabbards so that no more cadets need ever suffer that kind of humiliation. Reveille You’ll think, “Oh, what a cute Collie” until you learn that this stupid dog is the highest-ranking member of the Corps of Cadets (“Cadet General”), and therefore directly responsible for their kicking the shit out of you after you rush the field. Midnight Yell Practice The idea that yelling had to be practiced first came up in 1913, when a bunch of geniuses started getting together to “learn heartily the old-time pep” (back then, even Aggies talked like they went to Harvard! Anyway, now it involves 25,000 peppy idiots screaming at Kyle Field the night before home games, and at a designated spot in enemy territory before away games. He was most famous for nearly murdering a bunch of players who also won zero national championships at A&M, including Gene Stallings.These dudes belong to the Crimson Tide, so just let them go already. The Jizz Jar Aggies might or might not have a tradition of spilling their man-seed into a jar and then setting the jar on fire because it somehow represents the hated UT Tower.The local bar, Dixie Chicken, claims to serve more beer per square foot than any other bar in the country.It’s a sure bet that your College Station sweetheart will have plenty of practice chugging a mug.(the author of this post fully admits that Texas hasn't won a national championship since 1970, and that Vince Young hasn't won a national championship since 2005, and that maybe frustration had something to do with this 1.They have so much school spirit it’s terrifying A&M doesn’t have freshman orientation.


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